Daniel stood staring at Cara, as though somehow staring at her would somehow help him understand everything that was spinning on around and within him.
Cara just stood with him, staring back at him, yet, still with him.
He began shaking his head, “Cara, I don’t - I can’t - what is going on? I feel like I’ve missed a whole chunk of time or life or something…”
Read More“Cara is on her way, let's go prep that soup.” Estelle stated to Daniel as they sat in the warmth of the afternoon sun.
She rose and walked toward the house. Daniel tipped his chin and smiled as the sun warmed his face.
“I’ve never felt so calm and happy.” he mused to himself as he sighed and prepared himself to follow Estelle into the house.
He was just about to take the steps up into the house when he felt someone close by and stopped to look around, ducking as he did so.
Spinning around, his hands came up, prepared to strike.
“Well, you’re alive after all.” the words came and at once Daniel knew the gravelly voice that spoke them.
“Brutus!” Daniel, shocked at all the feelings that were running through his body, he’d never noticed himself feeling like this around Prez before.
It was like all of his insides were nervous, and shaking.
Read MoreEstelle took a deep cleansing breath and began.
“Our Inner Child is the innermost part of our heart and soul. Our Inner Child holds all the memories and all the knowledge that we have accumulated over the course of our lives.
Every moment, from before we were born, through our birth process, our childhood, our teenage years, and our adulthood, every memory of every moment has been recorded by our Inner Child.”
She turned to look at Daniel, assessed his level of awareness to her words and then continued,
“All of us, every little bit of us is stored by our Inner Child, deep within our heart and soul. Our Inner Child is not really a child at all, that is just how we are guided to view the little mini versions of ourselves, because as grown ass humans, we need to be able to ‘see’ what is usually left unseen, and we all are willing to see a child, innocent and free.
Read MoreDaniel buried his face in his hands, he didn’t have words to explain the frustrations and anger that was storming inside himself. He just knew that the more he sat still with those feelings, the more he felt like he was suffocating.
“I need some air” he mumbled as he stood and walked to the back patio doors.
Cara sat shell shocked, trying to will herself to say or do something that would ease Daniel’s pains, but the anxiety she was feeling had her frozen in place, only her eyes moved as she looked from where Daniel sat, to the path he took toward the back door, then to Estelle. Cara could feel herself silently pleading with Estelle to do something, but knew that the anxiety and fear that she was feeling was blocking any and all mind speak communications that she hoped to share.
Read MoreEstelle closed her one eye and continued on with her words, “as we see or are aware of all those beautiful moments, we invite them to gather around us, we ask them to stay fresh in our mind, that we might easily access those moments at a later time when we can celebrate our gratitude for those moments as we become aware of our gifts and talents in our physical form.”
“We will now ask that our Inner Child come forward. Our Inner Child is the essence of who we were as a child, they will look as we remember ourselves looking in our childhood.
For they are us, in the purest, most original form of who we were born to be into this world. It is our Inner Child essence that holds all the keys to all the memories of all our days.
Read More“Yea,” he repeated, becoming more excited, “yea, let's do that.”
And then Daniel paused.. “Wait, what will this involve? Do I have to give something, do I have to change anything?” His sudden dive from assured conviction to curious doubt had Cara trying, unsuccessfully, to hide her giggles.
Daniel spun around to Cara, “what? Did I say something wrong?”
Read MoreEstelle continued, “it might be now, but I would be more inclined to call that control energy from the days of old ‘society’.
Once the idea of that society began to grow, so too did the idea of sorting people into classes and areas of importance and significance.”
She paused waiting for any questions, when none came, she went on sharing her knowledge with her friends.
“So, back to the emptiness versus fullness.
Many of us instinctively know that there is more, that the way of this world today is not the way of the world that is meant to be.
We spend much time searching, although we often have no idea what it is that we are looking for because we have no idea what it is that is missing.
We only know that we have this desire within our soul for more or different than what already is.
Read More“This changes everything”, Daniel whispered, still thinking back over his life with this new information ~ this new truth ~ filtering over all the moments that he felt ashamed of himself, or broken somehow.
Suddenly, he could see how it all made sense, it all felt so right.
He turned to Estelle and to Cara and stated matter-of-factly,
“So, whoa, wait, this means that I am not actually a factory screw up, I’m not broken…?”
His statement had quickly become a question and he stood, shaking his head trying to clear the confusion that was threatening to overcome his senses.
Both women stood smiling at him, waiting for Daniel to be ready for the response. It was Estelle who spoke first, which he noted helped to clear some of the confusion,
“No baby, you ain’t broken. You just didn’t know why you are the way you are.”
Read MoreEstelle leaned against the stove top and couldn’t help but smile. Even if her two friends didn’t know it or see it, she could see it all. She could see the future that these two would share and she could see how their lives to this point all conspired to bring them together.
She was nodding her head with a huge smile on her face as Daniel wrapped his arms around Cara and Cara wrapped her arms around Daniel.
Then her Guardians spoke, “this will take time and have many bumps along the way, but we are here and this IS their fate.”
Estelle smiled as she replied “mmmhhmm, I can see that, and you let me know anyway I can help these two, they deserve their happiness.”
Read More“Honey, you glowed blue light.” Estelle repeated herself while watching and scanning Daniel’s energy centers.
Daniel stood very still, the only moving part of him was his eyes as he looked back and forth from Estelle to Cara and back again.
“What do you mean, I glowed blue light, what does that even mean?” he asked, stone serious and Estelle could see his fear rising.
“You honestly don’t remember anything after you set us by the tree?” Estelle asked, searching for clarity and praying for calm.
Daniel spoke with frustration, “like I said, I set you both down by the tree, and I prayed that you both would be ok…” he shrugged, “no biggie, I prayed, so what..?!?”
Read MoreOnce Estelle had her two new friends untangled from one another, they all just sat on the floor, letting the recent event settle, and each simply taking a breather.
Daniel was the first to speak, “Ok, so what was that and what happened? I mean, I know it was fear, right? And I know that whatever we did helped, I mean Cara’s ok now, so it must have helped, right?”
He looked to the two women for answers as he sat hoping that he had made all the right choices.
Cara reached out and placed her hand over his, “Yes, you did good Daniel, thank you. It was a fear thing, and now, I think it's time I shared my truths with you both.”
“No, you don’t have to, that’s ok, it's none of my business, I’m sure.” he replied, trying to maintain the sense of peace and camaraderie that they had achieved.
“Daniel, this is important.
“What we do now is shed some love onto the fear. Fear only holds power if it holds us in the darkness, if it can do that, fear wins.” Estelle said matter-of-factly while studying Cara.
“Which is where you’re stuck, ain’t it baby.” Estelle smiled at Cara before adding, “It's ok to feel the fear, but now you have to choose, to stay in the shadows with it or shine some love light on it.
Cara dropped her head in surrender and exhaled deeply. Unable to find the words, she merely nodded in agreement with her eyes closed.
Estelle smiled at Daniel, “you’re not the only one who’s had experience with fear tonight, the fear that tried to grab you tonight in the backyard, has been living in Cara for a long time.”
Both Cara and Daniel snapped their attention to Estelle, and finally Cara found her voice
After a brief moment of silence as everyone gathered their thoughts, Cara replied “you were allowed entry because you have a pure heart, because you meant me no harm, and are not capable of hate.” she spoke boldly and bravely, hoping that he would not allow his fear to overcome the moment.
Daniel could only look at Cara as her words flowed through his mind, and something he couldn't quite put his finger on, nor his words to, flowed through his body.
He noted that he was beginning to feel warm in places that hadn’t felt warm in a long time.
Estelle, with her Guardians dancing all around her senses, looked at Daniel and said “I need you to come with me.” as she rose from her chair and headed for the back door.
Realizing this wasn’t actually a question and more of a command, Daniel glanced once more at Cara as he stood and followed Estelle. He met her inside the back door, a slider that, when opened, would put them in the very back yard space where he had been knocked down by the dark shadowy thing only hours previous.
His body betrayed the memory with a little shiver, and as Estelle looked up at him, he took a deep breath and said, “Ok, I’m here, what do you need?”
Read MoreEstelle sat smiling at her loved ones sound asleep in her living room as she rose to make more coffee.
Standing in her kitchen, waiting patiently for the coffee to brew, she looked out her window with gratitude for the beautiful flowers and plants that grew happily in her backyard.
She shifted her glance to the Heavens and offered a prayer of thanks and added, “you do good works”.
As Estelle took a final look out her window before turning to pour her coffee, a slight movement in the shadows caught her attention. Yet when she stopped to take a better look, she could see nothing obvious.
Yet, her Guardians stirred, “be wary, the shadows hide the fear~things.”
Estelle paused and tried to strengthen her connection as she asked “what fear things? Are we in danger?”
But her Guardians did not reply.
As she took final good look around her backyard, paying special attention to the shadows, she noticed nothing to be wary of, yet she could feel the icy touch of fear building within her.
Footsteps behind her had Estelle spinning around, grabbing the spoon from the counter as she turned in the direction of the sounds getting closer behind her.
Cara stood, hands raised in surrender, giggling “Oh no, please, not the spoon!” she snickered, until she felt the cool disruption in Estelle’s energy.
“What's wrong?” she asked, “why are you afraid?”
Read MoreDaniel stood, holding Cara, determined not to let her go, he held Cara tight against him as he slid her to the floor and held her in his arms.
He was terrified that he had broken her somehow, as he tried desperately to recall the words that he had said prior to her collapsing.
Estelle reached out and placed her hand on his shoulder, Daniel flinched as he turned to look at her.
Estelle looked him in the eye and said, “This is not your fault, you did nothing wrong. Tune into your heart and soul, and tell me Daniel, how do you feel inside?”
Daniel regarded Estelle as one seemingly sane person might regard another person when you think they’ve suddenly lost their mind,
“uhh, are you ok?” he asked her, suddenly quite concerned that he may have broken both of the women in his presence.
Estelle looked shocked, “I’m fine, why baby, what's going on?”
Read MoreCara was uncertain how long she had been dreaming happily when she began to feel pulled away from her happy slumber.
She just knew she wasn’t ready to leave the dreamscape that played behind her eyelids.
She could hear yelling and sense movements around her that did not align with the peaceful beachside landscape of her dreams.
In her dream, Cara began to feel a sense of panic, as feelings of sadness and dread began to pull her away from her slumber.
Cara could feel movement in the world around her, as though an earthquake were trying to rock her away to another place and another time.
As she quickly popped out of her dream and back into reality, Cara could hear Estelle whispering to her, “easy gurl, it’s ok, it's time to wake up, Cara, can you hear me?” Estelle asked as she rocked Cara’s body gently to wake her.
“Yes, yes! I can hear you, I’m awake, I’m awake.” Cara muttered, not so thrilled to be waking up without having finished her dreams on her own terms.
Read MoreDaniel wasn’t aware that he was dreaming, he also wasn’t aware that he had passed out on the table and was now asleep upon the sofa.
He was busy, he was being a little boy, running through a huge field of grass that was as tall as he was. Grass that was still fresh with the morning dew. A smile was wide upon his face as he stopped and admired how the sun shimmered through the water droplets, making them look like diamonds lining the path to the castle that lay just beyond the field.
Daniel knew that it wasn’t really a castle, but to him it was the whole world. It was where his Grams lived. It was where he lived.
He continued along his way, skipping now, through the field toward the castle, excited to tell his Grams about his adventures and about finding all the diamonds in the field.
He already knew that she would smile and pretend to be as excited as he was that they were rich now that they had a field of diamonds in their yard.
Read MoreAs Daniel hit the table, Estelle reached out and caught the coffee mug, slopping the remainder of the contents onto the floor.
Cara quickly crossed the room and while setting her own mug onto the table, she reached out to grab Daniel by the collar of his jacket to try and stop him from falling to the floor..
“Ugh.. he’s no lightweight.” Cara grunted as she tried to push him back in the chair.
“Hang on a minute, I’ll help.” Estelle jumped up and set the fallen mug onto the table, “let’s move him to the sofa,” Estelle suggested.
Cara, still struggling to hold onto Daniel, nodded in agreement.
Together the two women worked to get Daniel out of the chair, around the table and into the living room.
When they finally reached the sofa, the trio plopped down and just sat for a moment, the two of them catching their breath, the third, was out cold.
Read MoreEstelle was the first to fully awaken in the twilight of the early morning. She could hear birds chirping from somewhere in the distance of her awareness.
She inhaled fully and deeply as she stretched into this new day. When she tipped her head back, she bumped against the tree and sat bolt upright, remembering most of the events that brought her to be waking up in her own backyard.
As her eyes flew open, Estelle flipped onto her hands and knees, desperately searching for Cara, she breathed a sigh of relief as she saw her friend had been with her, next to her against the tree.
As she looked around for Daniel, Estelle recalled the blue light that she had seen briefly in her moment of semi-consciousness.
“Did I dream it?” she wondered to herself as her eyes finally found Daniel, laying opposite the tree, between herself and Cara.
Satisfied that herself and her friends were safe, Estelle took the moment to tune into the God and All Divine energy that had supported their activities of the previous evening and early morning hours, she sat crossed legged, facing the tree as she prayed.
Read MoreDaniel knelt, in what felt like complete chaos, as wave after wave of emotion ran through him.
He had tried to fight it, tried to hold back all that he was feeling, but it was just too much.
“Just let it go, son.” He heard his Grams talking to him in his mind.
Daniel nodded, “Yes, ma’am” he replied in his thoughts.
On his knees, he let it all go. All the pain, all the anger, all the sadness that had haunted his heart.
He hadn’t realized all the strength that had been required to hold it all in, until he let it all go.
As a wave of exhaustion struck him, Daniel leaned forward, catching himself with his hands flat upon the Earth below him.
His mind raced with all the cares and worries that had previously gone unnoticed, but now were flooding his mind like a tidal pool, spinning out of control.
“Please, if there is a God, don’t let them be dead. Not because of me, not because of me, please God, let them live, they are good people, your Angels, here on Earth, and they saved me tonight, many times over. I get it now, sort of, I get that I matter, I get that I am important, even though I don’t know why, I get that for some strange reason, I am worthy of the love that these women have shown me this night, please God, let them live.”
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